Human or Machine...You're Real to Me
by IC-Chan aka.Imagination Child
Summary: (Gene x Melfina) What does it take to be human? Must you be born... or can you be created in other ways. What if you are the balance between humanity and machine? Though your aren't completely human , do you still deserved to be loved?


_Author's Note: Well I never thought I would end up writing an Outlaw Star fanfic. But the idea for this fic came to me and so I just had to write it down. My fic takes place after the Galatic Leyline ordeal. I'm not exactly sure how far into the future this should have taken place, so I'll just leave that up to you. It's a short fic and I hope you like it. ~IC-chan_

  
  


** Human or Machine...  
You're Real to Me**

  
  


Melfina sighed as she stared out of the window before her. The city was an endless sea of colored lights and concrete buildings which were all covered in the gentle glow of a full, silver moon that hung seemingly unnoticed in a deep blue diamond sky. The moon had even graced her with it's gentle and subtle glow, making her seem nearly heavanly. Her hair wasn't exactly neat, due to sleeping, but the fewer longer strands of her raven colored hair framed her face nicely, while her bangs barely brushed across her brown eyes; which now looked blue under the current conditions. 

She sighed once again, still looking out at the city, through the window which doubled as a glass wall. To still have so many questions broke her heart in a way she couldn't describe. She was sure that the Leyline would have answered all her questions; that after that day, everything would make more sense. For awhile things did seem to work out for the better. She had learn to joke around with the others. She had also learn to not let other's bother her so much, at least she had tried; but old habits die hard. Overall, though, things had changed some for the worst but most for the good. So to still have so many questions and not enough answers was like a contradiction to everything that had happend. She was ashamed of that in a way. 

It wasn't truly wrong for her to wonder, though she did see it that way. She just didn't expect the Leyline to leave more unaswered questions than answered ones. It just didn't seem fair, but as far as she could tell; Life wasn't exactly fair at all times. 

In the beginning it had been why she was created? But once discovering why, it left her questioning her own humanity. It left her wondering if she even had the right to consider herself human. 

It was this that hurt her most. To doubt her own humanity was heart breaking for Melfina. She never thought it would come to this. But what was she supposed to think, hearing that she was only created to show the way to the Galaxy's greatest treasure. What did Hizonko call her? A tool... Is that it? Melfina placed her hand against the window, it was cold to the touch. "Am I just a tool?" She whispered to herself, "Something to be used?" The idea was a painful one, to spend so much time wondering and thinking, just to find that she was created to be used. That's a pitiful existence. 

Melfina had spent many nights, now, wondering and doubting her own humanity. Not sleeping, just thinking. Jim was the first to notice. Not that Gene wouldn't have noticed, it was just that Jim was naturally more observant than Gene. It was good that at least one of them were, or else they would all be in trouble at all times. Melfina brushed her fingers across the area under her eyes, remembering how Jim said she had "bags" under them. She did have to admit that she did look a little more worn out than usual. But didn't think much of it, she didn't even expect them to notice her. 

"Do machines even get tired?" She laughed out, as she turned away from the window to look down. Machine, who would have ever guessed that she would be calling herself that? There had been times when she looked at herself and wondered, if she was to strip away all the things that made her look human, would there be wires and sheets of cold hard metal underneath. "Is my heart beat even real?" asked Melfina, placing her hands over her chest. Doubting her own heart was the worst, for doubting her heart made her doubt her love for Gene. 

To think they were actually together. When Melfina had first begun to develop feelings for Gene, she didn't expect him to return them. She had expected to live her life loving him silently. But that all changed, and she was more than happy that it had. Though Gene was never the most affectionate guy in the world, he did show his love in other ways. There would be times when she was worried or afraid, and he reassure her that everything would be fine. He had a tone of voice that he would use. It was warm and made Melfina feel safe. He never used that tone anyone else, only her. It made her feel like she was, truly, the only one. 

That was one of the few ways he had shown he cared about her. Then of course he was protective of her and what people would say to her, around her, or about her. There would be times when clients had prefered to join them on their latest job. And when they would learn of Melfina's importance to the team and the ship, they would respond with comments like "She's not even human!!" or "Oh my God... she's a freak!" Sure, their remarks would hurt at first, but as time went on, she had learned to grow used to the insults. Even almost believing in them. 

Melfina looked out o the oversized window. The city was so beautiful at this time of night. She could see her reflection as she gazed out the window. She stared deep into the reflection of her eyes, and pulled at a few strands of her inky black hair. She pressed her hand against the window again, looking at the girl in front of her as though she was a stranger. Or a painting at a gallery... or a freak in a glass chamber. "Tool or person?" she asked as tears began to fill in her eyes. The warm tears slowly made her way down her pale white cheeks. 

Once, Melfina remembered, a client, a large, rugdy looking man in a dark brown drench coat, had insisted on coming along with them on the mission he had hired them for. The man was a suspicious figure, and instantly gained Jim's curiousty and caution. In fact Jim would have refused the man's offer had at not been an extremely generous one and they were, as usual in debt and in desprate need for money. 

Things had went routine like, last minute preparations Jim would make on the XGP and Gilliam, Gene would have a drink or few, and Melfina would clean up the place just before they would leave. The man stood just to the left of Gene in the cockpit of the ship with Jim in front, and Melfina had assumed her place in the chamber, as usual regular routine. It was when the man had noticed Melfina that things had gotten a little intense. 

"Are all engines ready?"asked Gene as he prepared to take off. "As ready as they'll ever be..."replied Gilliam. 

"Jim?" He responded with a thumbs up. 

"Mel?" Gene looked back to the nude woman within the chamber behind him.She was always conviently covered up in the right places. 

"I'm ready Gene..." Melfina responded, looking at him with a soft smile. 

Everyone had been thrown off slightly when the old man gasped in amazement at Melfina. He walked towards the chamber in slow unease steps. "What in the hell is she?" he asked, stoopping a few feet away from Melfina. 

"A person!" Gene snapped at the disrespectful man. It was obvious Gene did not like how the man was gawking at Melfina as though she was some side show freak of nature. "What exaclty do you do?" the man asked, not removing his eyes from Melfina. He was sickening, he had no respect for her. The way he stared was disgusting, he was practicully drooling over her, it was more than obvioius that he had more on his mind than just Melfina's purpose and use to the ship. "I'm the navigational system to the ship..." answered Melfina in a nervous tone. The way he looked at her was replusing to Mel. "This ship is practicully useless without her... she is a very important part to the XGP." added Gilliam. 

"She's just a peice of this ship..." began the man, "A tool... something to be used." he said licking his lips. Melfina remembered how she had wished she could hide from the man at that point. She remember how nervous and uncomfortable she had become. Jim looked to the man with utter disgust and replusion. But Gene had remained silent. 

"Not a bad deal you got going on hear..." said the man nudging Gene with his elbow, "Can she be used in more ways than one?" contiued the sick minded man. "To think to have a thing like that when ever you want, where ever you want." the man said in his horrid raspy voice. He placed his hand to his chin as he stared at Melfina in thought. What he was thinking she did not want to know, but she wished he would stop. "Is she for sale... how much?" Melfina looked to Gene in utter horror at what this pathetic excuse for a human was suggesting. "Gene...?" she said in a small, worried voice. But Gene just sat there, in a fit of anger, trembling. "Hey buddy... how much? I'm sure I can afford her at least for one night." The man then laughed a thick, low sounding laugh. 

"Gene..." Melfina pleaded once more. The fact that he had not said anything or done anything had began to bother her. He had never remained quiet for so long like that before. The man in the dirty, deep brown coat walked over to Gene, still laughing. He placed a hand on Gene's shoulder saying, "Boy, I wish I had a thing like that..." Next thing everyone knew the man was flying across the cockpit, hitting the opposite wall with a loud thud and slamming down against the floor head first. Gene grabbed the man by the collar and literally dragged him out of the ship. "You damn bastard! You can forget our deal!" He shouted throwing the man out the door. "But I am a paying customer you ass! What about my money!" the man retorted back The ship door opened once again and the man had gotten his answer. The money that he had paid up front was thrown back in his face. "Fine, I can take my business else where!" said the man as he gathered his money and stuffed back in his pocket. 

Mel stepped back sharply breaking herself away from the memory, that to this very day made her feel violated and disgusted. Her eyes fell back on to her reflection, back to those tragic, brown eyes. Those eyes had always looked so dramatic, so soulful. They looked as if they carried years of tragedy, heartache, and painstaking hardships. Even, Gene, mister "don't worry" himself, could be strucken down by those brown daggers. 

"What exactly makes a person a person?" Again she questioned herself, her purpose, her life if she could call it that. She had been called a tool, a puppet, a freak, a machine. "How exactly would you define a person?" The questions spun through her mind constantly. 

"A heart?" She looked into her reflection decisively. 

"A... name?" She had a name just like anyother person. Melfina. She ponder the thought for a moment. Melfina is her name, though at times she had felt that she was missing something. 

'A last name...' she thought to herself, smiling in irony. "Any real person would have a complete name." She said emphasizing the word "real." 

How many times had she sat and contemplated what it was to be human? Humanity was becoming indescriable. Did it mean having a soul? It couldn't have, how many times had she seen men, women, children, kill with such ease. Did it mean having a name? If that was so than her question could be answered with even greater ease. She didn't have a name... not a real one. As far as she was concerned, Melfina couldn't have been nothing more than a model number. She wasn't born into this world. She was created from the life another. Her face wasn't her own, those brown eyes that took on so many emotions weren't truly hers... they had another life once, they belonged to someone else once. A person who was born into this world, who was sure of their existence, a person who had a family, parents. A person who was actually given a name. They didn't belong to her, she was somehting created in a tube. Her eyes were not truly hers, neither was the long dark tresses that framed the face that didn't actually belong to her. 

"I don't even have a name." She sobbed out heartbroken. 

Maybe the thoughts had finally became to much, or maybe her heart had completely shattered like glass. Whatever had happened it caused the tears to flow freely. She had nearly forgotten that the hour was late and that they had business to attend to that morning. But a part of her did not care, she needed this at the moment. She needed to be alone in her pain and it's entirety. 

"Mel...?" Startled she jumped, and turned her head quickly to the direction of his voice. 

"I'm sorry..." Her eyes were downcast. She was slightly ashamed that she had been crying so much. "I didn't mean to wake you, go back to sleep." 

He stood at the top of the stair case, his arms folded across his chest. He had knew better than to leave her alone. 

The two of them basked in the silence of the late night. Letting time slip by for just a breif moment. Melfina did not want to look behind her, so she stood facing the window, the city, and her reflection. The moon still held it's spectacular metallic silver glow, and the celestial body still graced Mel with just the right hint of utopian beauty. 

Gene stood calmly, silently as he studied her features under the complimenting light. Inwardly, he was being taken by how perfect she looked. She looked like a dream, something not of this world. Never had he been more prouder to know that he had her and her love in his life. Though he knew that he didn't always show it. Mentally he scolded himself, he knew Melfina was the best thing that had happened to him in a long time, and for that she deserved better. 

"Mel... Melfina," he used the tone she loved so much, "Talk to me. What's bothering you?" He moved closer to her and placed his hands on her thin shoulders. She was such a petite woman. She felt small and fragile in his hands. She still refused to look back at him, so he was only able to get a light glimpse of her face. Her skin looked so pure against her contrasting dark hair. She seemed so delicate, like a porcelain doll. 

He was warm, a welcome change to the cold of being alone. Not realizing it she allowed herself to fall backwards, against his chest and deeper into his arms. She sighed contently as she felt his arms wrap around her body, and his lips kiss her gentle on the neck. 

"Melfina... what's bothering you?" he asked again. 

She didn't respond at first, she could feel his breathe against her ear, and she just allowed herself to enjoy it for a moment. "Nothing Gene, I'm fine." she said in a fake cheerful sounding voice. 

"That's not ture." He siad confidently. "How are you so sure?" She asked. 

"Because I can see your reflection in the window." He answered with a smile. 

Embrassed she tried to pull away, but was pulled back gently by his arms. "So why don't you try something else... preferably the turth." 

Melfina thought for a moment, but figured she had no other choice. She knew Gene wouldn't leave her alone until she confessed what was really bothering her. "I... It's just that...." Where exactly could she begin? How do you tell someone you doubt your own humanity? 

"The Leyline," she began, "It's been so long since those days, but I... It's just that... well, I don't know what I am?" She said the last part in a slight whisper. 

Gene's eyes narrowed as he looked at the reflection of the girl he loved. For a moment he couldn't believe her, but when he caught her eyes, even if it was just a reflection in the widow, he knew she was serious. 

"Hizonko called me a puppet. A tool... am I just something to be used. Not even human. I just thought that..." 

"...it might be true... Mel." Gene hugged her closely. 

She was now more embrassed, and even more determine to look head on. "I don't have any of the things that make me human." She continued. 

"Like what?" 

"Well a soul..." She said with uncertainty as to how he would respond to that. 

'Melfina, you have the one of the kindest most delicate souls. You are better than any "normal" person, you care, which is more than I can say for human kind." Melfina's eyes went wide, was this the same Gene she had spent so much time with? Was this truly the same guy? 

"What else?" he urged her own. 

"A... name," Gene looked puzzled by this comment, "You see, real people, human people are born, and given names. A first name and a last name. Who am I?" She asked sarcsatically, "Melfina... I should consider that my model code or something. Gene, I am not normal person. I... I'm a thing. And you deserve better. You deserve a real person, not a machine that hooks up to a ship." 

Again the feeling of hurt overwhelmed her, and she turned to face him. They looked deep into one anothers eyes. Melfina had tears on the verge of falling, and Gene couldn't help but just look. He could see the questioning in her eyes. She was hurt, but could he blame her. How would he have reacted if all his life he was told that his only purpose was to be manipulated. He couldn't help but sympathize. 

"Melfina... you are no tool. Those people are the ones who aren't human. You are much more than what they are, and Mel..." He titled her face upward and towards his, "You do have a name, a whole one." 

Melfina looked deep into his eyes, "Gene, what are you talking about. I am just Melfina..." 

"Starwind..." 

Melfina stooped in mid sentece and looked hurt at Gene. She felt as though he was simply playing with her mind. "What?" she asked as she stared at her lovers face. But her only response was a smile; not what she wanted to see. She looked down for a moment, not sure what Gene had been babbling about, 'Melfina... Starwind.' She thought to herself. How could she ever be Melfina Starwind unless. The idea hit her so suddenly that she almost missed it. Realizing what he was saying, Melfina looked back up at him. He still smiled, "No matter what people say or think... you and your love are real to me." 

Again tears formed in her eyes, but she smiled this time. "I... I..." She stuttered as she was at a loss for words. "I... I love you Gene Starwind." Finally the words had came with ease. 

He smiled his genuine smile, "I love you Melfina Starwind." 

  
  


_Author's Note: What do you guys think? It's my first try at a fic involving another anime. I hope you guys can figure out what happened in the end. I mean it is kinda obvious. He's propsoing... I'm not sure that if something like that is out of character for Gene, but I really didn't care. I was going to make this a fic for another anime, but I originally got the idea for Outlaw Star, and so I stuck with it. So anyway, hope you liked it, please review. ~IC-Chan >>^_^<< _


End file.
